If you have ever been an accountant, you may experience what many accountants experience, the desire to escape and live an exciting and imaginative life. An accountant with an imagination is one you should try to avoid, unless you like having meetings at the prison visitors room. I have tried with all my powers to execute my professional and ethical responsibilities, but the rules and regulations are more active and changing than lion hunting. One slip up and you can be shredded. I was just recently reintroduced to an old Monty Python skit. You should enjoy this even though it is decades old. It still applies to me to this very day.
Now that you have watched this silly farce, remember this next time you talk with your accountant. When you are with them, roar slightly and sing “Career Guidance Counselor”, they will act all stoic and stodgy, as if they didn’t understand you, but they will get it. If they try to remain stoic and stodgy say the following words, one at a time, with a pause in between while they prepare your tax return in front of you:
- Tediously dull
- Appalling and tediously dull
- Desperately appalling and tediously dull
- Drab and dreadfully awful, desperately appalling and tediously dull
- Stuffy, drab and dreadfully awful, desperately appalling and tediously dull
- Dull Dull Dull Dull Dull Dull Dull Dull Dull Dull Dull Dull Dull Dull Dull Dull Dull Dull Dull
And now for something completely different,
If the accountant looks at you as though you were insane, sing again “Career Guidance Counselor” and make a whipping sound while holding up your chair. If the accountant still appears to be stoic and stodgy, leave his office and head over to mine. I’ll get it, we’ll laugh at my predecessor and I’ll gladly accept your new business.
Who says we accountants are all stuffy, drab and dreadfully awful, desperately appalling and tediously dull? You see those of us accountants who want exciting second lives as authors have a slight imaginative edge over our stuffy, drab and dreadfully awful, desperately appalling and tediously dull, spineless, timid, humorless and easily dominated colleagues.
And there you have it, my new client attraction business model for 2013 – The desperately humorous accountant! I’ll even sing out the results of your 1040.