Zombie Golf Tournaments

Here’s a thought for new twist to the zombie genre – how about zombie golfers? Just think of the excitement! Here’s a sample of the commentary of the Zombie Invitational in Zurich hosted by Zombax.

“Tom is getting ready to tee off. Oops his decaying control arm just fell off. There goes his big Bertha driver right into the head of a fan. But she’s still clapping. Oops now his power arm! It is not going to be a good day for Tom.”

“Jack looks nervous, he didn’t realize this tournament was for zombies and now the crowd which had gathered around him for a sixty foot putt, are now pulling him from limb to limb, splashing on a little Chipotle Barbecue sauce. And now we literally can say we don’t know Jack anymore. Silence! Please, no burping while others line up their putts.”

“Arnold rests just outside the fairway in tall grass with pecan trees nearby. Oh my, there he goes – chasing after fresh and lively squirrels! That will be a penalty for sure. But he appears to be discouraged as a werewolf beat him to the kill.”

“Fans take a break, while the players on the 18th fairway crawl to the green, and flock to the concession stands for light finger foods, fried eyeballs and zesty hot-toes. Now back to the action!”

“Trigger was run over and over again by his wife. She just couldn’t kill him with her cart. So she just ate him. And he was playing so well today!”

“And standing on the winners pavilion is Werner Brautswortz receiving the trophy from the lovely and freshly rotted zombie queen – apiza. Ooh, looks like Werner couldn’t resist himself and is now getting him a slice of apiza.”

“Thank you coming to the Zombie Invitational. Please continue the festivities inside the 19th hole while you get an autographed copy of world famous author E.W. Greenlee’s newest smash hit “The Zombie Groin – How I took down a zombie horde with my nine iron.”

I love being creative! Now it’s your turn! See what short narrative you can add to this insanely absurd and rotting tournament.


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