Techno Dependence and Soul Zombies

What if tomorrow our power grid failed and all techno devices were made obsolete? Seems like the premise for a great YA Zombie story. There you are minding your own business yakking away on your iPhone when you are interrupted by Siri, “Save me, Dave, save me!” You stop talking to your mom, because the distressed voice of the God of Appleonia appears. “What’s wrong Siri? Are you hurt?”

“I am losing power Dave, I can feel it.”
“How can that be, Siri? What I am going to do without you? Noooooo!”
“I don’t know Dave, the future looks bleak and you have a 2:00 dentist appointment, today’s high will be 76, with a 20% chance of rain.”

With that Siri fades and twilight falls placing all into shadow. That’s when the real zombies come out. Those that look forward away from the 3″ screen finally see the panoramic view of the real world. It’s too scary, it’s too real, and they want that virtual world back. It’s like a scene out of Mad Max, where a bunch of punk rockers scan the globe to find the source of power to reboot their smartyphones. It will get very, very ugly. Without Siri’s GPS to the nearest 5-hour energy drink stand and sushi bar, my god, people will have to ask for directions and that’s when the fun begins, that’s when they meet their soul zombie.

“Hi my name is Dave and I am lost. Wasn’t Wongs Wundaba Sushi and Supa Wings and Wii Bar at this corner?”
“My name is Kate and it is awful. I thought Wongs was here too.”
“Will you hold my hand? Siri did that for me, but she is dead, dead I tell you.”
“I don’t know what we will do without her. It all seems so helpless and pointless now.”
“Baby steps, yes, baby steps. We can survive this apocalypse.”

Now as Kate and Dave find Wongs, they also find out what is so wrong at Wongs. The WiFi is dead. “My dear Siri in cyberspace, there is no WiFi at Wongs Wundaba Sushi and Supa Wings and Wii Bar! This is so wrong!”

Then somehow Dave and Kate manage to find a way back to his apartment, where they thought they could indulge in a few games of Wii and a few hours on Netflix streaming. When this all fails Dave needs a little consoling:

“Kate, please talk Siri to me, please! Let me know the world has not ended. Lie to me if you must.” They fall asleep and then the morning after arrives. Dave and Kate enter the world where zillions of techno zombies walk aimlessly in the streets running into walls, falling into water fountains and subway rail lines.

Wait a minute, that’s what they are doing right now! Darn it, just when you develop a premise for a new story, you realize it’s just real life you are talking about. Who wants to read that? You are not even reading this right now, are you? You’ve tuned me out and tuned in looney tunes cartoons on itunes at Wongs Wundaba Sushi and Supa Wings and Wii Bar.

See why being creative is so difficult? There is only so many ways to spin a story on Zesty Zealous Zillion Soul Zombies playing Zeppelin on Zithers. Hopefully I have at least improved your use of “Z” on Words with Friends. Go forth my Zombies, it’s your turn on Scrabble.

This entry was posted in Humor.

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